An Expert's Review
8 Helpful / 8 Not
Pros: Hole 1: Endangered Forest
270 feet dead straight. Basket sits on a small hill. Deep creek filled with all kinds of crap on the right, bike path on the left. Optimal shot is a RHBH that turns right slightly and fades back up the Ehill towards the basket or a LHFH that does the same. Intermediate or advanced players should never get worse than a 3 on this hole. Endangered plant areas are located behind the basket for your viewing pleasure. Go across the Greenway to get to Hole 2.
Hole 2: Cliffs of Death
190 feet through a small window, down a big hill, and slightly left. The Cliffs of Death wait for you if you go too long or too far right. Don't go down the Cliffs of Death. You will die. Optimal shot is a putter or midrange that stays straight until it gets through the window up top and then fades left a little. Definitely a birdie hole.
Hole 3: Tiers of Allah
200 feet up a big hill and hard left. Team Monkey Dust sponsors this hole where if you hit a tree you will likely roll back down off the Cliffs of Death. Optimal shot is a high, hard fading shot past the first row of trees. You should end up on the top of the hill with a birdie putt. Watch for your disc to roll off the hill, not even the newly installed Tiers of Allah can stop rolling discs. Follow the path and then go behind the gym to get to Hole 4.
Hole 4: The River Hole
485 foot par 4. Fairway turns left after about 200 feet and then is straight for another 200. There are 2 pin placements. The first is up on the hill to the left and the second turns back right some and is on the edge of a drop off into the woods. If you go right on the tee shot you will go down a huge hill and may approach the river or the rapids. Tee shot needs to get around the first corner to at least the manhole cover. Too short and you'll probably end up on the hill blocked for your next shot or down the hill. Too long and you're in some thick woods. One of the harder holes on the course.
Hole 5: The Deathly Hallows
240 feet that is straight until the end and then up a hill and to the left. If your drive is short and left, you will be in the Deathly Hallows. There is only one escape to the Deathly Hallows, throwing out sideways. Even then you still have a sharp turning 3rd shot up the hill. Miss the fairway right and you'll likely be down in a hole in the woods.
Hole 6: Snake River
290 feet down a big hill and hard right. You may not know it, but Yo Momma sponsors this hole. Thick woods on both sides of the fairway. Missing to the right makes a really difficult 2nd shot. Two pin positions, the first is up on the hill a little and the second is on the edge of Snake River. ALWAYS aim for the down position. You will be given many riches for doing so. Look in the tree as you cross the bridge and you may just find a disc. Cross Snake River and go up the hill to get to Hole 7.
Hole 7: The Clancy
285 feet up the hill and to the left. This hole sucks. If the pin is in the bottom location, which it never is, it is a very easy hole. The 2nd pin position is up the hill the full 285 feet. You have to have your disc fade left and then back right to get it close to this pin. You're not going to do it. Spit on this tee pad as you leave.
Hole 8: The Chick-fil-a Supporter
260 feet. This hole is straight. It is proud of being straight. It buys chicken nuggets because it is straight. Jon and Sue Anne Beym sponsor this lovely hole. Thick woods on both sides of the fairway. There is a 2nd pin position tucked away to the right at the end of the fairway. Don't bomb it or you will go into a water treatment plant. Discs don't come back from the water treatment plant.
Hole 9: Old Man Jefferson
400 foot par 4 that turns right and goes down a big hill and across Snake River. Chuck Kniebler is the sponsor of this majestic hole, perhaps the signature hole of the course. The tee pad is usually completely buried here but never you mind. Throw your drive around the corner, right by the majestic oak named Old Man Jefferson, and down the hill a little. Your second will cross Snake River again and land on the beach. There's a crapper near the tee as well. Give Jefferson a hug as you go buy and he'll grace your next shot. If your drive is short and right you may end up in the Wicked Thicket. Get it out any way you can, the Thicket has been known to cause 6's. There are other pin positions located by Jefferson.
Hole 10: On the Rocks
265 feet up a hill and slightly right. Swingin' Matt Gillis sponsors this last hole on the Front 10. There is a 2nd tee way up on the hill that nobody ever uses that makes the hole 465 feet. If you flick your drive well, you will end up on the rocks by the basket. There is nothing you can do about it. It will happen. The best shot here is a RHBH that turns over and glides up the hill with a little fade at the end. Follow the dirt path up the hill and cross the Greenway to get to Hole 11.
Hole 11: Ant Farm
340 feet down the hill and left. There are ants everywhere on this tee. Always. They will bite you because they hate you. Drives need to get over the creek. Thick woods on the left and the Greenway on the right and up. Get your drive over the creek and it's a sure 3.
Hole 12: El Conundro
320 feet out of the woods and to the right. If you don't want your drive to hit the bushes on the left of the chute, you better sing the El Conundro theme song. It's to the tune of the Carpet Country jingle, just substitute Carpet Country with El Conundro. The woods on the right are a jungle, avoid it at all costs. When it rains the fairway and woods become a swamp. It's always windy when you try to putt on this hole.
Hole 13: Fly and Die
345 feet straight and down the slope. Sponsored by Team Fly n Dyes. Thick woods on the left after about 250 feet, road on the right. You will usually have an awkward downhill putt. If it rolls, it may roll into a sewer outlet. Jeff never mows the grass on this hole.
Hole 14: Ace Ventura
190 feet up the hill. Jeremy Densmore sponsors this delightful little hole. You can either RHFH through the opening in the woods or throw a high, hard fading BH around the trees. This hole is your best ace chance on the course. The ghost of King Whippet still haunts the middle trees on this hole to this day. Either cross the road or go to the dirt next to the power pole for 15 tee.
Hole 15: Aztec Temple
From up, this hole is about a 450 foot par 3. Throw it straight and long and you're set. From down, it's a challenging 550 foot par 4. It's dead straight until the very end, but woods and a creek on the left and a road on the right. Don't hit a cop car if it passes by. Rumor has it that an Aztec Temple used to be in the woods to the right, but it was torn down due to safety concerns and the woods were cut out. Darn.
Hole 16: The Power Pole
290 feet and dead straight. If you hit the power pole by the tee, local rule states that your drop your pants and run to your disc. The hole plays slightly uphill and there is usually some wind, so it plays sneaky long, a definite birdie chance though.
Hole 17: The Boomerang
350 feet up the hill, right, and back down. A RHFH/LHBH is the best way to go. You're not going to get a birdie on this hole unless you throw a great drive. Probably the least played hole on the course.
Hole 18: The Ghost Basket
320 feet slightly downhill and slightly right, if the basket is there, that is. Jeff W. took the basket and hid it somewhere, never to be seen again. You can either play to 15 basket, through the small opening in the trees or air it out and aim for the traffic circle. Just don't hit the new Lexus trying.
NEW: The basket is back! Credit to Tommy Boy McAdams and his pickles for getting it back.
8 of 16 people found this review helpful.
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