People at your day job speak/write under their real names. Most people here do not. That is the difference. All the most cordial people here either post under their real names or have revealed who they are.
I am 100% for internet anonymity in the right spaces, but I think you're way better off in places like here not being so.
I speak with far less words in person and have far far far less issues with people responding to me. Because people forget with text there is no tone and inflection, no body language.
What people do is add in their own personal opinion onto what that person is saying vs actually reading the words for what they are. I've never been in here to be hostile to others or talk down to others. Maybe brow beat a little, but its a discussion group, not a circle jerk group. I'm not here to give everyone a tug cause they said something on the internet.
I just try and speak clearly with what I'm thinking about on the topic at hand to illustrate my opinions or thoughts on the topic.
I have nothing to hide or who I am. You can find my real name everywhere. There are pictures of me, instructional video's. I'm in news casts, news papers. whatever.
I offer to take people on reddit or anywhere out to play as a local ambassador for my area.
There has been a few times I've ended up with people online who hated me online in groups, but after meeting me in person, they understand and we get along great from there on out.
People just take things to seriously on the internet, they add in their own feelings to hard to words on the screen and make up fake narratives for people and then start responding to that person like that even if that person isn't true.
I'll drop this link in here. This was a requested deal cause me and this guy hated each others guts, mostly in a game way. But I couldn't effing stand this guy.
Oh look here we are in oakland california.
Cause we figured out after that huge interview that we were just missunderstood.
My living room that night. hahaha.
Point being. People put WAY to much emotion into online conversations. Nobody is attacking you, you're just looking to be upset and you're looking to respond emotionally because you've made up the story of who you think that person is, vs who they are.
I get new guys here online who attack me locally, then I see them at the course. I try and talk to them and all those big words are suddenly gone, and I'm just trying to look at them in the face and say "hey dude, I'm not the bad guy, and I don't hate you."
Edit.
I should add in here. I'm kind to everyone. If you keep treating me poorly in return. I do stop returning the favor. There are people that I talk poorly about, its because I got fed up with trying to be kind.
I can only clean the shit off my shoes so many times before I start throwing it back at you.
So yeah, when you see me actually being mean to someone its because I've given them 3 or 4 chances and they keep acting a fool.
Edit 2.
I totally forgot to respond to Nick's actual post.
Yes, people do away with some things online for sure, and you can tell the ones who are doing it. It's blatantly obvious. The anonymity online causes people to do horrific things because there are 0 consequences.
I see people in the real world cause I do teach 1 on 1, I do participate with my community. I do help others when they visit.
Do you think I'm over here hiding behind anonymity when I'm talking brashly online when I'm actually putting myself out in the DG community publically?